eND_CReDiTs / 19:23
ea.
Psych! OF COURSE, the vid needs to end one more time… & OF COURSE we need an ending title sequence to mirror our indulgent introductory title sequence. In the beginning, you just got the names without an association with who is who. So now, you get to put the names with the faces (& the bonus of their pseudo character names, as well). And for each person, you get to see further behind-the-scenes moments before the final end.
eb.
The song is Boyfriend, “Marie Antionette.” I found Boyfriend on Spotify a while ago, I think soon after I came to Utah while I was still in contact with Atlantic, because I remember sharing it with him & him having the same “holy sh*t” reaction. But then I came across this song just this Spring, in time for me to know hands-down I had to use it somewhere in my project, & it just seems to have a “last hoorah” feel to it — final final end.
ec.
You get a good look at the fake blood in Lindsey’s teeth here (there because she had to break the capsule with her teeth in order to apply it to my stomach). She’s the kind of friend who will do whatever it takes to make your fake sore look perfect. I love how you finally get a good look at her white rabbit tattoo*
*these names definitely made a lot more apparent sense in the longer version of the script. but, I’m happy they made it in as tendril scaffolding still attached to the more epic version that never was. lindsey is the white rabbit, though, because she is the first member of the “crew” who breaks through the fourth wall - that the performing “me” sees. i think it’s rather powerful that through my empowering network that ends up being mostly men, it is a woman, a female friend, who first makes contact. and, she hands me the bleach - shows me how to continue down the rabbit hole on my own…**
**me and jose ended up getting a pet rabbit after the shoot. i named her patti jo smith after patti smith & joseph smith & josephine march. she’s a savage bunny.
ed.
Lindsey now works in Lehi at the Solar Sales startup where I used to work. I don’t see her enough anymore. #shesopretty
ee.
This was in the batch of surprise footage that Doug & Sid shot together after principal shooting that day, when me & Jose were taking paid showers at the truck stop gas station. What a fun Easter Egg to find & what a mood Doug must have been in that day — to be on camera so silly. It’s just everything.
*doug is the mad hatter b/c he’s a mad visual genius.
ef.
Doug’s back in LA now working as a DP & a colorist.
eg.
These are some of the best burns on all the film we shot.
eh.
Sid looking so G holding the color chart. If you look closely, you can see he has a lil’ black cat* tattoo on his face. #YEAHheAboss
*Sid is the cheshire cat b/c he’s sneaky & powerful.
ei.
Unfortunately, Sid is abroad for the moment indefinitely. I hope to see him back in the states soon for more collaborating!
ej.
This was shot in my apartment, where Doug & Sid stayed a couple nights while in SLC. With a local beer in hand, Doug filmed Sid showing him around like an episode of Cribs.*
*notice the “joy” on the wall. i collect things that say my middle name.
ek.
I love this fun little Easter Egg of Aaron Moura* wiggling his eyebrows at camera before Doug frames up. And, Aaron’s freeze-frame is probably one of my favorites, with the vapor & the shades & the telephone lamp & the bleach & the boom.
*Aaorn’s the caterpillar b/c hookah & the fact that the fuzzy end to the boom mic kinda looks like one.
el.
Aaron Moura now lives in Long Beach, CA with his friends & band-mates. He’s gonna do some music for my thesis project.
em.
This is following the take where I pour the bleach on myself & melt wicked-witch-of-the-west style into the tub. The water was really cold & I was really cold, so I sort of let it all out at the end there. And Linds doesn’t know if I’m okay & Aaron’s flinching because my scream just wrecked his ears, & you can see my Pop’s socks flapping on my feet as I threw a micro-fit.
en.
Love this little moment with Alekh after we finished shooting the eat-cake-on-camera sequence, wearing my heart-shaped glasses & goofing off. I love that you can see him high-five me in my panda onesie that I wore directing off-camera that day.
eo.
Alekh is now attending college in China. Yeah. Such a smart kid.
ep.
I love that Tyrel gets this moment, smoking the hookah like a trooper in the corner, lookin’ like a pimp. I’m so glad he’s my friend. Thick & thin. And, I love how the smoke looks in green.
eq.
Tyrel nows sells solar down in Vegas. After a short stint with my old company, he set off on his own. He’s a true #renegade.
er.
I love that I give Robin this little fore-running introductory moment with her using her barbie doll to smash into mine.
es.
This shot, to me, is payment to Robin for being willing to break her diet & eat a cupcake for me to shoot for the movie. So, in turn, I immortalized her looking like the foxy fox she is. #rawr
et.
Robin’s down in Vegas with Ty, of course. Working towards her yoga cert. & being the best dog mommy to Jax in the world. *
*i miss them both, but it’s a good reason for vacation
eu.
I realize now that the whole gang has disbanded & TUBcake would be impossible to film today. It was the perfect moment where all the pieces were there, accessible, ready, & game.
ev.
I love this shot, where you see Jose with the helmet off, his epic hair blowing in the wind. I’m writing the words on the marquee board right now, & you can tell he’s freezing in the angel robe.
ew.
There’s just something so 1970s sexy about this shot. #crush*
*Jose is about to graduate from the u with his bachelor’s in film production, gearing up to shoot his thesis film next semester, too. #wetogether
ex.
And there his is, my Jose, how he looked *on arrival that morning, filming with his Sony A7s ii we use some in the film.
*i.e. cute af. that hair… (sigh)
ey.
This was shot on Jose’s Sony, Alekh is operating here on a fish-eye lens. I had to include this view with me directing in my panda onesie, Doug with his shoes off, & Jose in the helmet.
ez.
At some point on the shoot day out on the Salt Flats, I lost my phone. So, my extra materials acquired got nipped in the bud. But, I did shoot a little on Jose’s Sony while stranded in the tub that day, & snagged this little shot of me. I like it as the one chosen for my title card because you see a manual split-screen of me, & the words stating I’m myself “more or less” — meant to underscore the simultaneity of everything, the duplicitous nature of the movie both transparent & illusory. #REALlife
eA.
Before I lost my phone, though, I did get the awesome coverage of Linds applying my bloody sore. Afterwards, I took this little selfie moment where it’s apparent how I feel about it. #GREAT
eB.
Jose’s filming with his Sony A7s ii. It’s at the beginning of the first day of principal shooting, haven’t even got the first shot off yet. But, I was so excited. We were there. It felt — briefly — like I had done it. I got all the people there & all the furniture out there. It was all happening. I let myself feel success for just a second, before I had to go make the three days of shooting happen & the performance happen & then afterwards, the edit happen for months & months. The editor BJB now reaching this actual final moment in the edit, picked this piece of footage to put here because she identified with it (just as I do now, FOOTnote-writing-BJB). We did it. We did it. Together.
eC.
I can’t help but snicker a little every time when the song (& thus the movie, technically) ends on the line of “I’m a bad bitch” right as I wriggle my jazz fingers* excitedly in front of my face. It always feels a bit silly & yet I can’t deny that I love it every time. I want that kind of mojo. And, TUBcake is supposed to be about self-manifesting the kind of confidence you wish to have.
*And in the end you get a good look at the mood ring again, that atlantic gave me, that really, to me, symbolizes the new me - post a&B, post-woke barbie.
eD.
The song is (want to guess?) MADGE, again. Yep. During editing she came out with this super-mellow cover of SUM 41’s “In Too Deep” & I just jived with it, you know? And, doesn’t it just have the perfect quintessential “end credits” sound to it? When I needed something for this final scroll, it only felt right to reach back to Madge, & the fusion of old & new was just perfect.
eE.
Notice, there were 9 different cameras used in making this film*
*bolex, gh5, sony a7sii, red scarlet, gh4, dji phantom drone, gopro, canon 60D, and my iphone… cool, huh?
eF.
This is footage shot on my iPhone by Shujing — my friend, fellow graduate student, & TA — of me neurotically preparing my developed film rolls to be scanned by the new transfer machine at the U (bolted to a concrete wall in a half-finished room). At the time, I hadn’t even seen the images yet...* #wow